Mr. Wlecke's Obfuscations
Some Common Mistakes in English Composition

Once upon a time, long, long ago, shortly after the Earth's crust had begun to harden and I was still an undergraduate in forestry school, I took a course in English composition.  Forestry curriculum required it at the time.  The Prof, Mr. Wlecke, rejoiced in the practice of publishing the errors of spelling, grammar, punctuation, and construction that he had gleaned from our weekly compositions, in a little mimeograph which he titled with some variation of the word "obfuscation".  ("Obfuscation" refers to something that is obscure or unclear.)  We had "The Obfuscations", "Obfuscations Revisited", "Obfuscations III", "The Return of the Obfuscations", and so on for ten interminable weeks.  Not a bad technique, viewed in retrospect, as we all tried very hard to avoid making the weekly list of Obfuscations.  Perhaps it will work here, too.

OBFUSCATIONS I

**  For most documents produced in wordprocessor software, full justification (the words come out even, in a straight line down the page, on both margins) looks choppy.  In most cases left justification will produce a better-looking document which is easier to read.

** Capitalize words within a sentence only when they are truly proper nouns, not just to make them seem more important.  "Send the memo to the Rocky Mountain Regional Office" is correct, as is, "Send the memos to the regional offices".

**  Underlining text is the traditional cue to the typesetter to set italics, and should not be used as a means of emphasis; long passages of underlining are hard to read.  Use bold, italic, or bold italic for emphasis.

**  Spelling! Spelling! Spelling!  Misspelled words weaken the document and undercut the writer's credibility.  Most wordprocessors have utilities which check spelling as you write, but none of the utilities will catch constructional errors (using "hear" when you mean "here").  When all else fails, find a good dictionary.

**  Avoid the buzzwords or slang of the day, as they become the dead words of tomorrow.  How many of you know what a "simoleon" is?